Well, tomorrow is my two-week anniversary. I am a married woman!! The day was beautiful and perfect. But I am not writing about it yet. It takes me a while to gather my thoughts on things; which is why I am just now writing about something I have been turning over in my head for a while. And away we go…
At the moment, I am sitting in an elementary school classroom. It’s the classroom I have worked in for the past year and a half. A lot of you probably don’t know this, but I spent a short stent on a Christian record label in Nashville. I signed the deal my senior year of college and I thought that was that. My plan was set. It’s funny…when I picture myself as a kid, I realize that I just believed I would grow up and become famous somehow. Signing a record deal felt like it was that simple. I saw in my mind my songs on the radio, being on big-name tours, and lots of glamorous photo shoots. There is so much I could say about what it has been like for me living through the early twenties of my life. I have been so surprised (what do you mean, I’m 20 and I’m not famous yet?!?) by the changes of “plan”. I guess what I would like to write most in the big scheme of things is all I have found in learning to go with the flow.
After about two years, I split from the label in a little bit painful (mostly hurt pride), but very necessary moment of change in my life. I had been continuously writing, travelling, and recording my music just as I do now. But, I had also done a few other things I had not planned on up to this point: worked in a pottery shop, at a restaurant, sold kool-aid full time for a while (I kid, I kid) waiting for fame and fortune to magically arrive. Things were happening that hadn’t been part of my said plan and I was realizing how much of my soul had been comsumed by my idea of success and meaning and by the plan itself. You know that I moved to Ohio, you know that I met a man, you know that I became invested in a ministry that has changed everything I thought I knew about success and happiness. But, something else really providential happened in my life at that point that I want to share with you.
I, Kelly Pease, got a real-life job teaching music in a Catholic Elementary School. Now, keep in mind that my plan for my life was insta-fame. I never imagined that I would undergo the pains of the responsibility that come with being a normal human being. I mean, hello?!? Have you seen all of my stage clothes?? Do you know how cool I am?? (Hopefully, you are hearing the undertones of sarcasm as I ridicule my own vanity…but, seriously…have you seen my stage clothes?) But, I needed a job because I needed to eat and also because God had a new abundance of life He needed to give me.
So, I wake up at 6 to leave my house at 7 to get to work by 8. I sing songs with six-year olds like “Father Abraham” and “If You’re Happy and You Know It”. I teach the values of quarter notes and half notes. We clap rhythms and take tests and name the lines and spaces on the staff. It’s more than a hop, skip, and a jump away from having a multi-platinum record. And not because it is far away from so-called “fame”, but because it has been a part of the good God’s plan for me, has it brought me closer to the person I want to be; the one I am when no one is watching.
There are so many things I still don’t know about the plan. I do know that God has given me gifts I want to use in whatever way He sees fit. And I also know that being exactly where He is holding me in each moment of every part of His plan is success. It is abundant life. I can’t say enough about how fulfilling it has been to see those kids singing the mass parts or how it sounds when a ten year old prays, “I cast all my cares upon You!” The simplicity and detachment from the world I have witnessed in their lives at this point in mine is just what the doctor ordered.
More than anything, I am moved by the way that God loves me, that He would show me in such intimacy what He meant when He told us to be like little children. I love witnessing the joy they take in the things I often care so little for and how little they care for what I thought was so important. I like being the music teacher at St. Alexis Catholic Elementary School. I like that God really does have a plan for me and for the continual restoration of my soul. I don’t believe there is a right and wrong way to serve Him, but I have learned that His idea of how we do that is often different than ours and always so much better.
I don’t know if I have communicated what I wanted to say. But, I have a class of second graders playing “heads up seven-up” so I have to run. But, the bottom line is: trust the plan He has for you. Don’t get too wrapped up in your own idea of success or in the ways you think you have failed. Oftentimes, there is a victory in store you wouldn’t have recognized as a victory had God not re-routed your path to begin with. And take comfort in the truth that all we think we have lost and won is held in the heart of God and all He has for us there is love. Peace! ~KP
First, congrats on your marriage! I can’t wait to hear all about it. Second, I love your epiphany…it’s a good thing and it’s a good thing to finally rest in God, especially when you are ‘just in your 20’s’. Everything He does through you is ‘big’ and ‘great’ and to those little ones…you are ‘famous’.
Blessings
Shannon
Kelly! I love you and I am so proud of you! Congratulations on your marriage to the man God chose for you! Isn’t MARRIED LIFE SO MUCH FUN!???????!!!!!!?
I love reading your blogs. I love catching up with you. God Bless you, your hubby, your students, your dreams and all HE will offer you
Hope to see you soon…definitely see you in the Eucharist!
Your Sister,
Ragan (Borbas) Savedra
Where can I purchase your album “Road to Revolution?” I put it on wiki answers.com, but no results cam up. See you on Friday for music class!!!
Kelly, You will certainly be surprised to know that I am a 55 year-old kinder teacher and Catholic that LOVES your music and your zest for life and the plan God has for you! I have taught kinder for 34 years at an extremely low socioeconomic school in Texas and I thank my God every day for making my life so awesome and being able to share it with young children. God Bless!
God bless you.
I’ve seen you at Steubenville South twice (2008 and 2009) and I have to agree: your stage clothes are really cool! Congratulations on your marriage!